The Difference Between a Choice and a Decision (Personal Development Wisdom Snippets) | #657

[Agi Keramidas]
Welcome to Personal Development Mastery Podcast and this is another snippet of wisdom where I select my favorite most insightful moments from previous episodes. Let's dive right in.

[Hussein Hallak]
So there is a difference in my world between choice and decision. For many people, they are similar. Decision is usually, let's say, a choice you make based on data or options that are available to you, or basically based on thinking.

Decision usually requires thinking. Choice is a pure, let's say, decision that you make internally based on what's happening with you internally. So let's say I choose to become, to be a great father, that has nothing to do with the data in front of me, like, for example, having a great son or being in a position where I can be a good father.

It's not dependent on the outside circumstances. It's dependent on my internal drives. So choice is always internally driven.

A decision is externally influenced. You look at the environment around you, let's say, for example, you decide to follow this path because it looks more secure, whatever, but a choice is something that comes from internal. So most people confuse them where they apply choice to outside.

Like I choose to ride in my car and go. That's really a decision because you have a car, you have all of these things. That's a decision.

A choice is something you choose about who you want to become. So for example, and usually not supported by any data, like for example, I chose to become a rockstar when I was in the nineties, basically. And I had no, I didn't have a guitar.

I didn't know if I can get a guitar. I didn't know if I would suck at practice or not, but that's who I choose to become. And then my actions and thoughts and words flow from there.

So I went and got a guitar and then, you know, got a better guitar. And I trained for hours because I chose who I want to become. And then my actions flew from it.

A decision is usually when, well, let's say it's usually in business. You know, like we have this client, that client, this client pays us this much. We have this market to want to open.

And I look at the data and I make a decision. So that is, that is how I, how I would, would put it. And usually choice is powerful because it's, it's between you and yourself and what you, you basically making a claim on the future that you want to become.

I choose to become an artist. I choose. And the beauty about choice is you can change it the next moment.

I choose to become a guitar player. I grabbed the guitar and I thought I would feel very good about it. Then I was like, I really hate the guitar.

So I make a different choice, but it requires practice. It requires me to act on my choice to make a different choice.

[Agi Keramidas]
Hussein, let me ask you something different. It applies to many of the listeners of the podcast who find themselves in a position where they are successful on externally by, you know, the standards, the external standards, however, inside they may be feeling unfulfilled or at a crossroads or in a, what would you say to someone like that?

[Hussein Hallak]
Absolutely. Thank you very much for that question. I would say this is, I would call it, I call it the someday symptom.

And the someday symptom is someday when I get all this money, when I achieve success, when X, Y, Z are in place, when I have the right time, the right opportunity, whatever I will get X. So for example, I used to do that. I said like with my family, it's like one day when I have enough money, I will have enough time to spend with my family.

So we put these conditions that will, that between us and between what we want, what we're really after, the kind of person that we want to come. I want to be a great father. So in case I have to make a lot of money to give me enough time to be a great father.

It's the same. I tell the story of the, of the executive who went to Mexico sitting at a beach, saw the fishermen and the, you know, the story, right? It's really appropriate to what you're saying.

Okay. They see the fishermen, it's like, Oh, you have great fish. Have you thought, you know, building the business?

And the fishermen asked him, why would I do that? It was like, or how well you go, you know, buy a few boats, catch more fish, you can sell more fish. And then, and then what, and then, Oh, you will, you will grow your business.

And then what, you'll make a lot of money. And then what is like, Oh, you can go on the exchange, the NASDAQ exchange or whatever, sell the stocks. And then what is like, you can retire.

And then what you can come and spend time on the beach. It was like, but I'm already here. So a lot of times, uh, we, we put this, these barriers between where we are and where we want to go.

So the question is for those successful people, what do you really want? What is the thing that will give you that life? And then be realistic and anchor yourself.

What does that really mean for you? Who do you need to become to be that person? Because a lot of times, uh, success that we go after or how we measure success, the reason why there is a, because if they were, if they felt that they're really successful, they wouldn't need anything else.

And I don't, but most of the time, and I would argue, I may be wrong, but I would argue that we define success based on how the world defines success. So most of our definitions of success are not our own definitions. So that would say the first thing for them is to, and it's scary by the way, just heads up, because if we are trying to define success in our own way, we might discover that everything we've worked to towards is not success.

So it's scary to go there, but again, be compassionate with yourself, ask yourself that question and say, what is success really for me? What I'm really after. And then ask yourself, who do you need to become and then choose to that person.

And once you choose to become that person, your thoughts, words, and actions flow from that becoming. So you start doing what that person would do. Um, and then your life will start taking a different trajectory.

That's what I have to offer them. And I'm telling you right now, it's not easy, but it's enjoyable.

[Agi Keramidas]
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