#256 The power of hypnosis, how to overcome anxiety, and the language of intuition, with Adam Cox.

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EPISODE TRANSCRIPTION

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Please note that while an effort is made to provide an accurate transcription, errors and omissions may be present. No part of this transcription can be referenced or reproduced without permission.

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Adam Cox  0:00  
One of my life lessons my mantras is I either win or I learn. So I'm not afraid of making decisions. Because if things happen the way I want them to, I'm going to win, I'm going to get the outcome I want. And if they don't, I'm going to learn something which still makes me better. And that feeling that whatever happens I can't lose makes me unafraid to make decisions.

Agi Keramidas  0:26  
You are listening to personal development mastery podcast, providing those with the desire to grow with a simple, consistent actions needed to master personal development and create the life they yearn for. I'm your host Agi Keramidas. A few years ago, I found myself unfulfilled and unmotivated like I had lost my sense of purpose and my life was merely passing by. Since then, I've been on a continuous journey of personal development that has transformed every aspect of my life. Now, my mission is to inspire you to grow, stand out and take action towards a purposeful and fulfilling life. In this podcast, I invite myself inside the minds of remarkable entrepreneurs, authors, thought leaders, spiritual teachers, people who share the journey milestones and learnings for you to be inspired to grow. In this episode, you will find practical action points that you can implement right now. So make sure you follow the podcast to get them as soon as they are released. 

Agi Keramidas  1:32  
Today's episode is about hypnosis, what it is, how it works and how it can help you. My guest is the UK most in demand Hypnotherapist. Let's dive right in. In today's show, I am delighted to speak with Adam Cox, Adam, you are a clinical hypnotherapist, a radio presenter, serial entrepreneur, property investor, a speaker and coach. You're also host of one of the world's most popular hypnosis podcasts called the hypnotist which has at the time we record this over one and a half million downloads. And you are considered one of the world's most innovative hypnotherapists. And the UK's most in demand one working with celebrities, CEOs and even royalty. Adam, welcome to Personal Development mastery podcast, it's a pleasure to speak with you today.

Adam Cox  2:33  
So honoured to be on the show. Thank you so much for the invite.

Agi Keramidas  2:36  
Thank you for being here. These are what these little small introduction are very impressive credentialing, and also the the topic of hypnosis, I personally find it fascinating. And I'm looking forward to you know, shed some light and have your expert opinion about that for sure. Before we go there, I like to start my conversations with some kind of background from my guests. And what I usually ask is a milestone moment a transition like a key defining moment in life in life where things change changed direction show that would be a great place to start, I think.

Adam Cox  3:24  
Yeah, I mean, I guess the key reason why I'm a hypnotherapist is the I, I had to make a change in my life. And when I was 18, I left home for the first time, I was quite a shy, introverted child, and then living alone for the first time on my own. I didn't have the social skills, I didn't have the emotional intelligence to cope with that situation very well. What I found is that I would get anxious in social situations. And how I coped with that anxiety is how most people cope with anxiety, and that is that they avoid the things that cause the anxiety. Now, the problem with me is that people, I thought at the time, were the cause of my anxiety. So I started avoiding people. And to begin with it was avoiding big social situations. And then it was avoiding any social situations. So I became a recluse. And to elaborate on that, if someone isn't familiar with that phrase, I became isolated, I hid away in a tiny room about a sink or shower. And that was pretty much it. And I think the key defining moment for me was that I started as many people do, thinking about the future I was going to have if I couldn't interact with people, and it wasn't a very good future. So at that point, I entertained the idea of suicide because I didn't think it was bearable to live in that way. And the way in which I was thinking because As I had limited, you know, things around me to kill myself was to jump out of the window headfirst onto the concrete. That was my, my thought as to how I was going to deal with this anxiety and a bleak future. But I thought at the point where the idea of suicide pops into my head, because I seriously considered that it then gave me a frame of reference to say, well, if I'm willing to do that, surely I should try anything else. But that thing first, before I do that, and it sent me on a journey where I thought, okay, there must be someone out there in the world that has faced similar kind of circumstances. And I need to figure out what that is. But because I didn't like people, and because I was studying psychology at the time, I had access to a 24 hour library. So I would go to the library at night, I would alone, read books and read about the mind and psychology and thoughts. And I arrived to the conclusion that not everyone in the world, you have this feeling around people, and therefore, maybe people weren't the problem, but how I was thinking about people. And it led me down a journey to figure out that actually, a lot of my emotions were caused, as a side effect of the beliefs and the thoughts I was holding on to, and that if I changed what I believed, and if I changed what I thought, maybe I would change how I felt. So for me, my most defining moment is thinking of two different futures. A future where I hold on to all the beliefs that were making me feel really anxious, and you know, we're talking my heart beating it 200 beats per minute, and all the panic attack, you know, symptoms that kick in when your sympathetic nervous system goes into overload. So that was one future very bleak future. And then I entertained the idea of a different future. And that was not just not having this anxiety, but a future where I was able to figure out how to make changes in the mind. So that what was working against me was actually working for me that I could change my emotional state. And rather than be a victim of it, actually utilise it and have it work for me. So then I imagined a future where I had multiple businesses, and I had investments, and I had good friendships and relationships, and all these kinds of things. And that future was so much more appealing. So my defining moment really was kind of weighing up two options, a bleak future where I would, you know, be better off dead, or a future with amazing possibilities. And that really set me on a journey to figure out what happened inside my own head.

Agi Keramidas  8:00  
That's fascinating. I find fascinating, the fact that you already that time, you did have the emotional intelligence to contemplate on the other option, and not let the first option suck you down, because I'm sure there were very strong emotions died with the the choice. Was that a point further down the line, that you looked back at yourself at that time and said, Whoa, I've really gone over this, I don't I do have the social skills now do have all that.

Adam Cox  8:38  
Oh, many times, you know, part part of, you know, part of the downside of living a life that you didn't feel possible, is a feeling of maybe I don't deserve this. Because now I'm in a very privileged position, where, you know, as a result of completely changing my emotional state, I finished my degree in psychology, I worked in a radio station, which lots of people, you know, didn't, they were doing media degrees, I did psychology degree, and now I'm working in a radio station. And then I worked in a different company. And then at the age of 23, I set my own company. And then at the age of 27, through the success of that business and certain investments that I did, I was a self made millionaire at the age of 27. And at each milestone, I thought, well, there was a future where I was either dead, or just kind of completely alone in a in a tiny bed set. And that gave me a huge amount of gratitude. So that I think sometimes when people get a taste of success, it can bring arrogance, it can bring cockiness, but for me, because I had that reference in my life of, well, through a bit of luck, I was able to figure this out and not everyone is maybe I was an addict. Maybe I was still a recluse may I was completely dead. So it gave me a sense of many times throughout my life. I think even when I'm going through tough times, as an entrepreneur, there are always challenges, you know, there are always stressful things. And yet, it's difficult for me to be hit that hard. Because when I compare my life with what it could have been, I feel like well, yeah, all these problems that come from are a blessing in a way, because I'm fortunate to have a quality of problem that relates to, you know, the challenges of being a business owner or an investor or, you know, if I lose 20,000 pounds in a day, I'm grateful that I have enough money to lose 20,000 in a day. Whereas in a different parallel universe, there's a version of me that would love to have enough money to lose 20,000 in a day. So it gives me perspective on life,

Agi Keramidas  10:56  
to read a powerful perspective, especially looking back at what could have been, so it's great, thank you for sharing that. And moving a little bit further forward. What made you want to go into hypnotherapy? In particular, what was the the decision or the change at that time?

Adam Cox  11:21  
Yeah. So when I, when I figured out that I was creating all this anxiety as a teenager, it was obvious to me that this wasn't a conscious decision, I wasn't choosing to feel this way. It was an unconscious response to a combination of things like beliefs, and what I was focusing on and recurring thoughts, compulsive thoughts, and I wasn't choosing any of it. So it was obvious to me that actually, I had to make changes at the unconscious level, rather than the conscious level. And luckily, I was able to make those changes. And then, you know, when when I made those changes, I was then very driven, to have all the things that I didn't have as a very shy, introverted, insecure teenager, you know, materialistic things, you know, kind of, you know, a nice car, a nice house, you know, watches and things like that. And I built a business and I built a property portfolio and various other things. And I reached my mid 30s. And, you know, on paper, you know, from the outside world in, I should have been happy guy, because I had a relationship, I had children, I had not just one but several businesses, I had investments making me money. And therefore I should have been over the moon with with kind of contentment, except it felt that something was missing. And, you know, for me, I was, you know, it's difficult to have made big decisions on in your life based on intuition, and then not follow that intuition, to my intuition was saying, you know, something isn't quite right here. And then I play detective and start thinking, well, what are the things that I really think about? You know, just because I want to, and it was, it was psychology, it was about how people think how people make changes. And, you know, I was reading the book. And, and it was about, you know, having multiple streams of income. And I thought, well, I've got multiple streams of income. Could I have one more? And if I could, what would that be? And it was this idea of pursuing a hobby, that would also make me money. And I thought, well, what, what's my hobby, what am I most passionate about? And it was about psychology. And I thought, Well, I figured out how to make quite a significant change in my life that if I hadn't made that change, it would be very different. Maybe I could learn something, to figure out how I was able to do that and do that for other people. And then literally the next day, or at that point, I found a course online for hypnotherapy. I interviewed for the position the next day. And, and it was strange at that point, because I interviewed for the London College of clinical hypnotherapy. And the guy that was interviewing me was upset that I looked so relaxed, interviewing, you know, he thought, I should be nervous. And I and I thought, This is crazy, because you've got a hypnotherapist that doesn't know how to build rapport, you know, that doesn't understand. It would be my choice to do this course. You know, I'm not, you know, he doesn't decide if I if I'm worthy of the course. But anyway, I did a foundation course and I did several other postgraduate courses. And although I knew I was intelligent, I wasn't very strong academically up to that point, because I just didn't I knew I was going to be in business rather than, you know, following an academic route. But here in this world of clinical hypnosis, I was doing postgraduate qualifications, getting distinctions getting you know the top grades I I'm because it it came from a place of genuine interest in enthusiasm.

Adam Cox  15:06  
And then I got the good grades, I understood the theory. But one of my belief systems is that, you know, certain things you can only learn from doing. You know, nobody loves to swim by reading a book. So I kind of figured that, if I'm gonna be a hypnotherapist, I have to do hypnotherapy. And fortunately, I had, you know, almost 20 years worth of business experience at that point. So I was a Clinical Hypnotherapist on academically, but with a background in business and branding and marketing. So I was able to take those skills, and do what most hypnotherapist can't do, which is monetize it, actually turn it into a business. So I was able to quite quickly develop a client base. And because I already had the financial resources, I could rent a clinic on Harley Street, the most prestigious Street in the UK. And because of that, because of my background in PR, I was able to build a brand around it, I was able to do, you know, free sessions for celebrities in exchange for testimonials, which kind of meant that I was hypnotherapist to the celebrities, and I would have the videos to back it up. and various other things that meant that my, my reputation, my positioning was growing. And it all came from a place of being unfulfilled. And then thinking, right, I'm just gonna have this one area of my life, that is just for fun. And the weird thing now is that I have people trying to tell me that this is another business that I have, that my work life balance is all off that, you know, are you you're always working, you're always doing something. And I explained to them that most people have hobbies that they spend money on. You know, if you follow a football team, you might spend 5000 pounds a year on like, Sky Sports subscriptions and season tickets and all this, it just so happens to be that my hobby is hypnotherapy. And it makes me money, and your hobby costs you money. So the reason why I fight so hard to to articulate that this is a hobby for me, is I like the energy of it being a hobby. So even though, you know, my hobby makes more than a lot of full time, incomes, it's still only ever going to be a hobby for me, because I like the energy of it being a joy hobby, if that makes sense.

Agi Keramidas  17:35  
Certainly does. And there was a word that you used when you were describing that hobby, and that word was enthusiasm. So I think that is the key in all that whether it's something is a hobby, or a profession, or a vocation, or whatever it is, if there is enthusiasm in it, that in my in my mind, it justifies you going out for it, because it is given to you and so Jasmeet it's come with come from.

Adam Cox  18:06  
It's rewarding. And I think the key thing is that, you know, people that know me know how busy I am. And they say look at him, you don't need to do this, you don't need the money. You don't you know, why would you spend your free time seeing clients to do hypnosis? Why? Why do you? Why do you do that? And it's kind of like, because I enjoy it. You know, it's as simple as that. You know, and when you do something from a place of enjoyment, the energy is completely different. You know, and I think my clients also get a sense my hypnotherapy clients that, you know, if I don't want to work with a client, I won't, you know, there is, where's that that's a different energy, you know, typically people that are in the coaching area or change area, they're trying to fight to get a client, even if they don't really think they can help them because they thinking of the money first. Whereas with me is kind of like, I don't, I don't need the money, the money is a bonus. So therefore, you know, if I work with someone is because I truly feel I can add value to them, I can help them in some way. And, you know, and also, you know, it comes from a place of I like the challenge of trying to figure out the missing bit or the key leverage bit to change. So it's part detective, you know, I've got to figure out what, what's the belief system, or the cause the real root of the problem. But then also, there's this amazing thing that you get in, in change work in therapy work, which is, you know, if you're a builder, and you build a house, you get the pride of seeing a house, well well built. If you're an effective therapist, and you can help someone make a change, you know that their life from that point onwards is on a different trajectory. And therefore you get the pride of feeling like you haven't just changed their life but you've changed all the interactions that person Have with all the other situations is a really profound, powerful feeling that you don't get in a lot of other professions. So I guess the key reason why do I do it? I enjoy it. Why do I keep doing it? It's fulfilling for me, it feels good to do it. And it feels good to hear the feedback of the impact that I've had after I've done it, which becomes an addiction. And people believe that all addictions are bad. No, they're not. There's lots of addictions that are really good. You know, I like making money. I'm addicted to that. I like exercise. I'm addicted to that. I like helping people change their lives. I'm addicted to that. And if you're going to be addicted to stuff, why not be addicted to useful stuff.

Agi Keramidas  20:42  
I want to take a short break from this episode and quickly let you know about something I'm really excited about. For me, having a podcast made a tremendous difference in my life's journey. And I know the kind of impact that can have on one's personal development. And that is why I'm so passionate about helping coaches who are ready to amplify their methods and reach a global audience by creating launching and growing a top quality podcast, even if they aren't tech savvy and are limited on time. Maybe you have thought about having your own podcast, but you don't want to go through the time consuming learning process of how to create and launch it, how to record, edit, host and so on. If you said yes, I have a solution for you something that takes away all the complexity and allows you only to concentrate on creating quality content. Go to my website, AGIKERAMIDAS.COM to find out more and to get your free copy of my guide about creating and launching your podcast. Alright, let's jump back to the episode. 

Agi Keramidas  21:52  
That actually brings me nicely to discussing a bit of hypnosis with you. And let me start with something very foundational Adam just in case someone listens to this right now. And of course, he has heard the word hypnosis many times, but maybe he or she is not exactly sure of what it involves or what it is. So in a nutshell, can you tell us? What is hypnosis? And how does it work?

Adam Cox  22:24  
Yeah, hypnosis is utilising a particular form of concentration or focus, to be able to make changes that you can't normally make. You know, if you think of mindfulness at one end of the spectrum, and trance at the other end of the spectrum, when you're mindful, all of your attention is focused on real sensory experiences, what you see what you hear what you taste, what you feel. A trance is when your focus is mainly on internal representations. So you know, in the same way that I'm seeing you now and you're seeing me, if I said, Can you remember your earliest birthday, you might make an image inside your mind is still an image, it's still a visual representation, but it's an internal sense rather than an external sense. That's more like a trance state. So we're good hypnotist can utilise these kind of trance states to be able to make changes. And one of the key ways that a hypnotist makes change is by linking an emotion to a thought and then suggesting something. So for example, if there's a trigger that someone has that creates guilt, or creates anxiety, and you get them thinking of that same thought, but then you introduce a new emotion. So instead of it being guilt, it might be gratitude. And then you condition that enough times that actually the same thought makes them feel something different. You know, that there's a saying, and that is that neurons that fire together wire together, okay. So if you an emotion is one of the key things that that do that with with neurons. That's why people can remember where they were, the day that the Twin Towers fell down, or when Princess Diana died, or Michael Jackson, because there's an emotional reaction to that thought and they can, they can then remember where they were. And it's also why you can't remember most of what you're taught in school, because there was no emotion attached to that, that education. So if you can create a new emotion that interrupts the pattern, and therefore you can create a change, and my job as a hypnotherapist isn't to make random changes. But it's to figure out what's the key changes to make, that's actually going to make a difference. You don't want to, you know, go into, you know, it would be like a bad electrician. If the lights aren't working. He goes into the fuse board starts changing all the wires. No, you've got to figure out the one thing that needs to change and change that one thing and then test if it's worked. And then if the lights go on, great, you've you've got the result and if they don't test some test one other thing Thinking to change it. So as a hypnotherapist there's a big responsibility to make sure that you leave things better than when you find them. Otherwise, people are paying you a lot of money to, to experiment on them. And that's not fair. You know, you have the responsibility of actually, if someone's paying you to create some kind of change, if they're addicted to something, you need to break the addiction. If they've got compulsive thoughts, you need to make sure those thoughts aren't compulsive anymore. If someone has a phobia, you need to take that anxiety away from the stimulus. There is a responsibility on a good therapist. And unfortunately, there are lots of very incompetent therapists out there, which is why it was possible for me to enter a profession of within a few years, get get to relatively high almost the, you know, the top echelons of that profession, because there's so much in competency in that area. And I mean, you're a dentist. I've you probably haven't had someone come to you as a dentist and say, dentistry doesn't work. They might have had one bad experience with a dentist but they they make it specific to that dentist and they say I saw that dentist he wasn't very good. They don't generalise it to the whole of dentistry. They do with hypnotherapy. If someone is someone sees a bad hypnotherapist they say hypnosis doesn't work. No, no, you've worked with one bad hypnotist, find a good hypnotist, and then it will be different. So it's the nature of humans to generalise. So, you know, my job really, is to and that's why I have my podcast with almost 500 Real sessions of real hypnotherapy so that I can provide social proof and say hypnotherapy works with a competent practitioner, working with a genuine clients create change. And if I can just, you know, inspire a few people to say actually hypnosis may help them solve their problem, then then great. You know, that's, that's useful for me.

Agi Keramidas  27:05  
Can you give me a couple of common examples of problems that people come to see you about? Let's say the couple of the most common things that they would like to change?

Adam Cox  27:18  
Yeah, I think because I started out in you know, as a, you know, some of the background of marketing, you know, I decided to have specialisations within hypnosis. And one of those was phobias, you know, I had lots of anxiety as a child as a teenager. So, you know, I've helped hundreds of people with arachnophobia, for example, or fear of flying or fear of public speaking. And typically, within two or three sessions, I can make that phobia completely disappear. And, you know, it feels difficult for people to believe that's possible. Because if you've if you've genuinely experienced real emotions, the decades, it's difficult to comprehend that that can go in like a couple of hours, but it can. And therefore, you know, I feel like I have a responsibility for the those people that are living with unnecessary anxiety, they don't have to keep having it. But they just don't believe it can change. So if I can, if I can get one person thinking, actually, I'm, I always have that reaction when I see a B, or I always have that reaction when I see a dog, and they don't want it anymore. Well, a good therapist can remove that relatively quickly. We know how to do it, as a weak, good therapists know how to do it. But there's lots of bad therapists that don't. And that's the problem because someone might see a therapist and then go and they still have the phobia and then they don't realise that it can change. If anything, it increases the learned helplessness because then they say, I've tried hypnosis, it doesn't work. And then the they're stuck with the problem for forever, because now they have a belief system that change is impossible. And change is possible. If you find the right person to help you change.

Agi Keramidas  29:03  
I suppose one other reason that this happens in hypnotherapy is that the result is not so obviously it's not like black or white for you said about dentistry earlier it's much easier to see what's happened and feel and you know, when you're out of pain or your tooth looks good. So it's work with your with hypnotherapy, it's not or with a subconscious or with limiting beliefs with things you can't really see them a show. What I'm trying to say is that, but you can

Adam Cox  29:34  
if someone's afraid of a dog, yes. And they and whenever they see a dog, their heart is beating like this. And they're, they're really anxious. And then the next time they see a dog and they don't feel that way. They know. Yeah, they know. The problem is, most hypnotherapist do not test their work, because they're not confident in their own abilities. So a good therapist will elicit and try and while they're in front of you, you know, so if you have a phobia or something, I'll say, Aggie, you know, tell me the last time that you felt that thing, you know, where were you. And I can tell from your facial expressions, that you're re accessing that emotional state, and we do the therapy. And then at the end, you know, let's say that you're afraid of snakes, I say, Well look, just to check this as worked, I've actually got a snake here. Now, if you believe I have a snake, and you see me going to reach something, if the phobia is still there, you're gonna have a really anxious reaction, if the phobia is changed, and you'll outgrow it, where's the snake, you're like, oh, it has changed. So, you know, a good therapist is eliciting and calibrating to notice if change has taken place. But there's a lot of really bad therapists that don't even want to test it. Because they feel if they test it, and it hasn't worked, then the client is going to be upset, and they're gonna have to give the money back. Whereas for me, I don't care about the money. So I'm happy to test it, because my competency is more important than the money I make from the client. So you can test good therapy just as easily as you can test your dentistry. But a good dentist doesn't mind if they pass them the mirror, and they look inside their mouth, and they see. But a bad therapist doesn't want to pass the mirror. Because they're afraid of what the client will find. If that makes sense.

Agi Keramidas  31:27  
It makes it doesn't make sense. But what I wanted to ask is, are there any situations that are not like black or white like this, that you either have the phobia or you have not a phobia? If it is some other, let's say more complicated beliefs? Is it does the same still the same thing still apply?

Adam Cox  31:53  
It does. And you're right, there are more complicated issues. One of one of the most complicated issues I would say is obesity, and being overweight, right. And that is because they're in a phobia. Typically, there is one stimulus. And then there is one emotional reaction, normally, anxiety, in weight loss. You've got many, many variables influencing that. So you might have emotional triggers that encourage people to overeat, you might have social pressure from friends and family member encouraging you, you're going to have lots of belief systems, about what food means you're going to have habits that have built up over decades, because we live in a society where we have to eat every day, you're going to have biochemical elements in the sense that sugar is addictive, alcohol is addictive, they all have calories. So you've got these multivariable things. So some of it isn't just the therapy. It's psychoeducation. And one of the things I have to do as a hypnotherapist is to say, look, this isn't something that's happening to you, it's happening with you. And the metaphor that I use is I use stabilisers or training wheels on a bike. And I said, Well, look, you know, if you were just learning to ride a bike for the very first time, on two wheels, you might try and ride the bike fall off so many times that you believe you can't ride the bike. But what would happen if you had training wheels? And they say, Oh, it would support me? And I would say, do the training wheels pedal for you? And they're like, no, no. And do they steer for you know, it's like, well, hypnosis is like the training wheels, it's going to give you support, but you still need to pedal, you still need to stay, you still need to take action, you still need to make decisions, it's just that this is going to help you. And what would be crazy, is that you have a bike with training wheels, and you never pedal and you never steer. Because then you're never going to ride the bike. And what I am empowering them to do is not to become dependent on the therapy. Because in in therapy can be like personal development, and that is people get addicted to the vehicle, rather than the resources. And, you know, it's a nice way to make money if you can get all your clients addicted to seeing, you know, to having you as a therapist, but it's not ethical. As far as I'm concerned, I want to not be the resource, but to unlock the resources within them. So therefore, I'm not needed, because you don't want a client to be dependent on a therapist. But lots of therapists don't think that way. A lot of therapists say okay, you only need 20 good clients that you know that you're their therapist for the rest of their life. Any therapist that has the intention of being a lifelong therapist to a client, in my opinion, is a terrible therapist. Because surely good therapy is about creating a change and creating resource for Responsible states in the individual so that the therapist is no longer needed. That's my opinion. And I think because I have such strong opinions about this. And because I'm a therapist, that doesn't do it for the money, a lot of therapists don't really like what I'm saying, because it makes them look bad. I don't care. You know, I feel that we, you know, the therapy profession. If we were more competent and cared about our clients more, we would all have more clients that there's no shortage of people with problems. In fact, I would, I would, you know, flip it the other way around and say, Do you know anyone that doesn't have any problems? No. So therefore, we've got nearly 8 billion potential clients in the world. And I think that's, that's why my, my podcast has done quite well, because people are out there looking for answers, and they're not finding them. And then they stumbled across my podcast called The hypnotist. And there I am saying, you know, normally it costs quite a lot to work with me, here's my therapy for free, you know, and there's, I've not counted the last number of episodes, but I think the hypnotist has got over 500 episodes. So if you if you classify, let's say, each, you know, an hour session with me is 250 pounds. So I'm gonna, I'm just gonna get a calculator out here at the moment. So there's 500 episodes, you know, at 250 pounds each is 125,000 pounds worth of value that you can get off therapy on my, on my hypnosis podcast, not everything's gonna be relevant, because someone, you might not have a fear of flying, and there's a podcast episode about fear of flying, but the value is there, someone in the world can find it.

Agi Keramidas  36:33  
Let's speak about your podcast. Actually, I wanted to ask you about that as well, because you've had the phenomenal success over the last is it two and a half years now that you have the the hypnotist around here, yeah,

Adam Cox  36:47  
launched it in April, just after the pandemic. Reason for that is that I was in Harley Street. And then I knew that when the pandemic came, I would have less clients face to face, I couldn't justify the high rents of Harley Street. So but I still because it was a hobby for me, not a business. I wanted an outlet there for hypnosis. And I thought, I'm going to create a podcast where I create innovative hypnosis sessions with real clients facing real issues. Put that out there in the world. And one of my, one of my belief systems is around competency that if you truly are competent, you should put your work out there in the public, so it can be criticised or it can be challenged. And I thought, you know, me putting real hypnosis sessions out there in the public, that I would get a backlash from all these kind of people saying I did this wrong and did that wrong. And it was kind of like, I didn't hear anything from anyone. You know, and the numbers aren't small either. I mean, that the big numbers, and I kind of thought, you know, in different professions, you can get found out if you're incompetent. So if you said, you know, I'm a really good cage fighter, I'm really good. I would say, step into the cage, let's find out. Okay. hypnotherapists, they can say they're amazing, because everything is done behind closed doors, and it's all confidential. So nobody hears and I thought, You know what, I'm going to be the hypnotherapist that records my sessions, while still respecting confidentiality, put it out there in the world. And if people don't think I'm any good, tell me and explain why so I can get better. Because I believed in the NLP tenet of, there's no failure only feedback. And therefore every episode was an opportunity to learn, except nobody gave me any feedback. Other than good feedback. So I thought, right, either I'm either I'm naturally quite good at this, or I'm lucky or there is a fearfulness of giving me feedback, because they can't back it up with anything credible. But either way, the more you do something, the better you get. And you know that the key difference between me and lots of other hypnotherapist that graduated at the same time as me. I've seen hundreds and hundreds of clients, you know, and you get better at something, the more you do it. And not only that, you know, I kind of put it out there in the public domain. So it can be challenged. So people can say, Ah, you're and sometimes people do on not so much on the podcast, but on YouTube, this, your voice is this and that kind of stuff. But a lot of it is just personal opinion. You know, some people love my voice, some people hate my voice, you know, and some people like the music backgrounds and other people don't, but there's nothing really constructive. You know, rarely have I seen constructive feedback. But if I got it, I would welcome it. Because then I would I would reflect on that and think that's right, you know, I could try this approach and, and also I'm constantly learning but, but that's where the podcast came from, was this idea to have an outlet for my innovation, creativity, but also put my work out there in the world, like an artist that makes art and keeps it to themself isn't an artist they have to put it out to the world. And that's going to attract people that love that art. I hate that art. And I feel that a podcast is a form of art. You have to put it out there in the world. And then you can you see people's reactions. And luckily with the hypnotist, it keeps growing. It's it's almost 1.7 million downloads. Now it's, it's, you know, on course for, I think within the next few months, it'll be a quarter of a million downloads per month. And it generates me clients for free almost because people hear me, and they're like, Oh, I love that episode. But I want something a bit more customised to me. And it's like, Great, nice, easy way to get clients.

Agi Keramidas  40:31  
I love that I liked so much what you said the word outlet that you use the few times. And I will also second that with my own personal thoughts of podcasting, for me has also been an outlet for expressing myself for creativity, as you said, for experimentation of trying new things out seeing how they work, if they don't work, and very importantly, what you also said about putting your work, whatever it is, in your case, it was the hypnosis, the hypnotist sessions, but putting your work or your opinion or your thoughts out there and getting some feedback from the people that listen to listen to it or from the marketplace, if you want if it is business related. It's it's an outlet, I will stick to that word because it was, I think, very, very appropriate. Same word. And other based on all the discussion we've had, so far, if you were to give to the listener now, something actionable, something they can take an implement and do what would you tell her or him?

Adam Cox  41:51  
I think one of the key things that I found really useful for me to figure out the changes I need to make is a journal, you know, so I've kept a journal for for decades, I used to use a paper based journal, now I use an app, you know, I don't, I don't get any kind of referral fees for it. But the app that I use is called day one. And it's a cloud based app. So any device that I use, and I update it is going to be kept in one place. And I put my thoughts down my reflections, you know, if and particularly my emotions, I feel that emotions are emotions, and imagination is the language of intuition. So as you write these down, you can start seeing the patterns, but you rarely see the patterns. In the moment, sometimes you have to look, look from a wider perspective and say, Ah, I felt anxious, then I felt anxious, then I found out what what did they have in common in all these cases, and then you get to evaluate some of your own triggers or your own belief systems. And once you know it, you can change it. But a lot of the time, we're walking around with these kind of belief systems that we don't know. And these fears and anxieties and the triggers that we don't really comprehend. And in many ways, we're robots that are kind of responding to the the environment around us. With a journal, you can play detective in your own life, and then you can start making changes. So and you don't even need to see a therapist a lot of the time. Sometimes you can just look at your own thoughts and then challenge your own belief systems and say, Well, I believe that then do I still believe it now? No. Okay. And then sometimes that's all it takes to change a belief. But if it's a belief that was created at a point of really emotional intensity, if someone was raped or attacked, or you know, bullied or something like that, that's probably going to be a deeper belief system, tied in with a protective coping mechanism. Probably better to see a therapist in situations like that. But if you if you just have, you know, kind of, let's say, beliefs that are just no longer useful, seeing them in a journal, challenging them and then thinking, is it still useful to believe that or is it is it more useful to believe something else sometimes that's all it takes to change a belief system and one belief that changes can be life changing? So I'd say keep a journal and and reread what you've written is probably my my actionable tip.

Agi Keramidas  44:14  
Beautiful advice. I've been kicked out of America kept the journal for years as well. I still write it on paper because I love the pen and paper style, but I'm a big proponent of examining one's life or in devaluating. Adam, thank you, I have a have a couple of quickfire questions to wrap this conversation up before I asked them. What would you direct the listener who would like to find out more about you and what you do and your podcast of course.

Adam Cox  44:49  
So I mean, if if you wanted to hear my podcast, I have two podcasts one called Modern mindsets with Adam Cox, and the other called the hypnotist. You can find all of them on all of the podcasts plus forums. But if you actually wanted to hear a, you know, let's say, particular audio download, just because you're listening to this recording right now, I try and create as much value as possible. Normally, I sell my hypnosis downloads for 10 pounds each. But if you were to go to my website, which is Adam Cox dot code at UK, click the Downloads tab. And then you can you can download whatever you want, if you use the coupon code free, just get that free, you know, and it doesn't have to be one or two, you can, you can download 10 If you want and then you're getting 100 pounds worth of downloads completely free. Like I say, I'm not doing this for the money. So I don't mind if you get my my content, free my downloads free, I just want to feel like I'm making a difference in other people's lives. So Adam Cox dot code at UK, use the coupon code free and then just get what you know, you can actually hear me in action, you can hear my audio then

Agi Keramidas  45:53  
perfect, there will be in the show notes for you to find and click on them. Adam some final quickfire questions then to wrap things up. And my first one is What does personal development mean to you?

Adam Cox  46:08  
What it means to me is evolving being a slightly different version of yourself. So it doesn't mean changing who you are. It means evolving who you are. And, you know, when I think of the version I used to be, you know, when I was an anxious kind of isolated person. At some level, I feel like I'm completely different. I'm still the same person. But I've just a different version of me. And that's what personal development means. To me. It's kind of being not the not the perfect version of you, but just kind of an evolving version of you.

Agi Keramidas  46:42  
Thank you. And hypothetically, if you could go back in time and meet your 18 year old self, what's one piece of advice you would give him?

Adam Cox  46:54  
I would say I mean, at 18 years, it was just before I kind of became a recluse. And the advice that I would give myself Is there is there is lessons in pain, there was lessons in misery. And I didn't realise it at the time, it was only afterwards. A lot of people try and avoid pain, they try and avoid discomfort they try and avoid, you know, tough times. That's where the learning is, you know, and if you can extract the value from the worst times, then you know, the uncertainty of any situation doesn't faze you. Because one of my one of my life lessons my mantras is I either win or I learn. So I'm not afraid of making decisions. Because if things happen the way I want them to, I'm going to win, I'm going to get the outcome I want. And if they don't, I'm going to learn something, which still makes me better. And that feeling that whatever happens I can't lose, makes me unafraid to make decisions.

Agi Keramidas  47:53  
Fantastic. And what's one book that you recommend to the listeners based on the topic today?

Adam Cox  48:00  
Yeah, I mean, there's so many great personal development books. I would say just, you know, probably a book that hasn't been you know, I could say thinking grow rich and Awaken the Giant Within and they've probably already been mentioned before. The one I'm going to recommend is one of the great hypnotherapist is Milton Erickson. And one that really inspired me was a book called Magic in action. And it was the actual transcripts of Milton Erickson doing real hypnosis with real clients and changing their life. And when I read that book, I got the chills. And I think if I didn't read that book, I wouldn't be a hypnotherapist now. So it probably hasn't been recommended by the other guests before but magic inaction, real transcripts by one of the great hypnotherapist Milton Erickson would be my choice.

Agi Keramidas  48:51  
Thank you and no, it has not been mentioned before. Adam, I want to thank you very much for your time today for sharing your insights and your wisdom. With us today. I want to wish you all the very best with what you do and this impact that you're making in the world. So are the very best. Any last parting words?

Adam Cox  49:16  
No, it's just been a absolute honour privilege to be on your show. Thank you so much. And and I would just say one last thing to your listeners. So much work goes into building a podcast so that the fact that you're listening to this you know, don't take it for granted because there's a lot of podcasters that give up so the fact that you're listening to this you know shows that you know Aggie is doing something very special

Agi Keramidas  49:44  
Thank you for listening and I hope you got great value from today's episode. And if you'd be so kind please take a moment to leave me in Apple podcasts review sharing how personal development mastery has made a difference to the day and I will read the review the podcast. Until next time stand out don't fit in!

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